May Flowers

This has been a tough month. My little church designated me to be the preacher for the month and I have had far too little time to do anything else.

My first Sermon was entitled "Everyone Goes to Heaven. It really bothered one of our fundamentalists who is firmly convinced that some people go to HELL forever. Come on, really??? Our God is a loving God. The concept that people go to Hell forever simply doesn't hold water. I will explain shortly.

My second sermon was entitled "Pair of Cleats" - it is a play on words from the Greek word "paraclete" which means helper. Funny, at no time did anyone ever ask me what the sermon title meant. Maybe they all knew - or maybe no one wanted to ask. Or maybe no one really cared enough to ask. As a matter of fact that was the impression that I received on the third week as well - was that nobody cared what I was saying. Or maybe it was boring. could be - I imagine today's blog (May Flowers) might be boring to some people. I don't blame you at all; I am still a work in progress.

Coincidentally, my third week's Sermon was entitled "The Hour Has Come" which speaks to Jesus' time to finish his work on earth to ascend into heaven and to leave the Advocate for his disciples. What is the coincidental part? Well, I actually live a couple of hundred miles from my church and I happened to be in that area last weekend and so my Hour had come for me to give the sermon in the Sanctuary of the church instead of online through a Zoom connection.

And, while I was giving the sermon, I could tell that no one was listening. That is no one in the sanctuary. I think the folks online were listening but I guess it doesn't really matter.

You might be wondering why I would think that no one was listening. I had given the sermon the first time around about five hours earlier to a different church about 1o miles further away. The morning church laughed at all of my jokes (kind of like what Rod Stewart sang about in and to "Maggie May"). My home church did not even crack a smile. So one might think my home church is conservative, right? Nope, my home church is extremely liberal while the morning church is a lot more conservative.

I used to be secretary for my Lions' club. I wrote the weekly meeting ROAR to give information and could not tell if anyone ever read it or cared about the time I invested in putting it together, so I started adding obvious inaccuracies or humorous conundrums to see if anyone would comment. And comment they did. Hence, I decided to employ the same kind of hooks within my sermons and the conservative church always responds while I think perhaps my home base liberal church is simply tired of listening to me.

Anyway, today's May 28th sermon is not entitled at all - it is kind of like the emcee who introduces the next guy but for whom words cannot say enough about the guest and so they say "and now for the man who needs no introduction at all, help me in welcoming Mr. SoAndSo". . I figure the emcee did not do enough research to say anything about Mr. SoAndSo or doesn't like him and so he gives no introduction at all.

But, today, May 28th, is the Day of Pentecost and there are truly not enough sufficient words that can accurately describe what the day means to the Believers in today's world in an extremely short period of time. Although, I did manage to craft an 11½-minute sermon that should be sufficient for the 15 people or so who will make it to the church today - this is about 4 times more than how many attended last week's services. But we are having a celebration today - no, not for the birth of the church but we are baptizing a sweet little angel today from our youngest family in the church. Emery Nicole (last name withheld due to privacy issues).

And, yes, the Day of Pentecost does indeed mark the birth of the church. Some churches will go all out and bring a birthday cake and put about 2,000 candles on the cake and ignite it creating a health hazard all the way around.

The Day of Pentecost marks the day the disciples had the divine tongues of fire settle on them as they were baptized in the Holy Spirit and began to speak in tongues. I am sure that most of you believers found the occasion to go to the church while the non-believers got prepared for the Memorial Day weekend and braved the intense millions of planes, trains, and automobiles heading out for the weekend.

Well, it looks like i have run out of space to explain my belief system on why everyone goes to heaven. And my granddaughter's cat, Oreo, wants to come in to get some brunch. Finicky cat - He turned up his nose at my offering for his brunch time today. Maybe that is what I should do with the congregation today if they don't like what I am serving them. Let them starve - besides, we all know that God will provide what they actually need. to survive anyway.

Catch you on the next blog. Eventually, I will colorize this page and help it look really inviting. Enjoy your Memorial Day weekend and be safe in all that you are doing while you are wrapped in the protective clothing of God's Word... or at least be safe if you do not believe in such things.